A Renewed Perspective of God's Love

Yesterday was one of those days that will forever be etched into my mind.  At the center of all the activity was our oldest son Isaac.  The things that I saw and witnessed yesterday are the kinds of things that I will reflect upon for many years.  It's the kind of thing that one day when he gets married and he's standing on the stage with his bride to be, I will reflect upon.  On the glorious day that he accepts Jesus I will remember yesterday.  When I have the honor of baptizing him...the images of yesterday will run through my mind.  Maybe one day when I become a grandfather the events of yesterday will enter my mind.  But with all that happened yesterday, Friday the 13th of course, I have learned more about God's love, His provision, and His calling for me and my family.

It started yesterday afternoon with a frantic phone call from Rachel saying that the doctor's office had called an ambulance for Isaac.  Shamefully my first response was, "Great another doctor bill we can't afford."  But something told me that I needed to travel with him in the ambulance and experience this with him.  It was tough, but I'm glad I did.  We arrived at the ER and everything was routine.  After assessing his situation they began to give him non stop breathing treatments and put an IV in.  He was so brave...he never cried, even after they had to stick him a second time.  Then they began to pump a lot of medication into his little arm and then stuck him in the arm, which we were not prepared for.  At that point the side effects of the medicine started to kick in and he was breathing harder.  He was crying and vomitting.  The vomitting continued until there was nothing left and he was just heaving.  At this point Isaac lost it.

Have you ever been in a situation in which your child was hurting or suffering and you as a parent couldn't do anything about it?  That's when it hit me.  I knew everything they were doing was eventually going to help, but at the time my love for my child...God's gift to me, was overflowing with emotion.  The images that are forever etched into my memory were of Isaac looking right me gasping for air.  He was working so hard to just breathe.  At this point he was scared and so was I.  His eyes would get so big and he would pull away from me and all I could do was watch.  The sight of seeing your child struggle to breathe is one you never forget.

Our prayer is that God will help Isaac with his asthma.  We pray that God will take it away.  But if God's will is that he live with this then we will travel this road with him every step of the way.  And we will use his asthma to bring glory to the Father.  I pray that Isaac will be able someday to serve God and testify about how God brought him through these situations.  We do not want to have him feel sorry for himself but to recognize that God has great things in store for his life and it might involve asthma.

As the situation calmed down and he started to breathe easier and to relax, I began to pray and think.  The one thought that kept coming to mind was just how great God's love is for me.  I've often heard others say that you don't completely understand God's love until you have a child....I would have to agree.  The other thought that entered my mind was how brave he is.  After all that happened as soon as he was able to breathe and talk again, Isaac just like he always does, brought joy to my life.  He also brought a lot of joy and happiness to the doctors and nurses at Children's Hospital.  Even at such a young age he lives life bringing joy to others with his sweet sweet spirit.  I began to realize that Isaac inspires me.  The kid has been through so much in the 3 years he has lived.  Every time after he has had an episode like this he rebounds with smiles and laughter.  I think that is one reason why yesterday was so hard.  Because everything that was taking place was so out of character for him.  He sure makes being a dad a lot of fun!

In thinking about God's love I began to think about my sin.  Do you know what the Bible says about my sin?  The basic word for sin in the Bible is "hamartia" and means to miss the mark.  In other words to miss the mark of following God's law.  Sin is also something that separates me from God because God is holy, just, and righteous.  Furthermore the Bible says that the penalty of sin is death.  Very serious stuff!

But what about God's love...well Scripture also paints a very vivid picture of God's love and the center of it's attention is God's Son.  1 Corinthians 15:3 says, "For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures."  Then in Hebrews 2:17 it says this,"For this reason he had to be made like them, fully human in every way, in order that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people."

If I put these two verses together I see a very real amazing story.  My sin separates me from God, my Creator, and that my just penalty is death.  But God in His mercy and love sent His Son to die for me.  But the meaning is more than that.  He died for me so that I might have His righteousness.

As I reflected upon yesterday I could not help but think about Jesus on the cross.  I struggled and wept with Isaac yesterday as he fought for each breath.  Can you imagine how much God struggled to watch His Son die on the cross?  As Jesus struggled to breath, God the Father was watching His Son fight for each breath.  The difference is that God could have done something about the situation to save His Son, but we all know that He chose not to.  Why you might ask?  Well He didn't ask because of His love for me and for you!!  Because with Jesus' death my sins could be forgiven and even though I have chosen at times to rebel against Him...He loved me enough to make a way to live in righteousness when I had no ability within myself to do so.  That is truly amazing!!

The events of yesterday have also given me a new perspective on God's calling for my ministry.  Most of you know we have started a church.  Each day and week seem to bring new challenges for us.  Sometimes we feel disappointed because it seems like at times no one is interested in helping us.  It seems like we are having to do this on our own.  I find myself fretting over people who are not there which leads to discouragement.  But because of God's love for me how could I think about quitting when He has given us such a beautiful story to tell.  Just like how Isaac inspires me...this inspires me.  To keep going, stay faithful and obedient to God's calling for us.  Just to be thankful for what He has given me and for those great and wonderful partners in the Gospel that are helping us with our church.  To know that God allowed His Son to suffer for me and that in turn He would give me such a great and wonderful calling to start a church that is committed to telling His story is my motivation to keep going in the tough times.

God is working in Isaac's life and I know He has great plans for my boy.  But yesterday this daddy learned a lot of lessons about life and about my faith.  I cannot imagine going through this without my Lord and thankfully I don't have to.  Tomorrow is another Sunday for us and it will be a day that we continue to build our church.  But it's also a new day in which we take our situations and use them for the glory of the One who died for Jeremy, Rachel, Isaac, and Noah.

Thank you for reading and please continue to pray for us as we endure the battles of spreading the Gospel.

Jeremy